Probably more than 50...

..we were on a mission in that
thin-skinned old Humveee
The guys just out in front of us,
they hit an IED
We tried to help them in their struggle
To get free...
There must be fifty ways
To leave a bad war...

You know it's really not our habit
To attack
But there's a lot of oil buried in Iraq
They had it once before,
and now they want it back
There must be fifty ways
To leave a bad war
Fifty ways to leave a bad war

You just jump off the ship, Dick
Forget about those Iran plans
Lets redeploy, Roy
Just listen to me..
Hop on the plane, Jane
No need to complain, James
Just get out of Baghdad
Lets set em' all free.

You know he came home
having nightmares, wracked with pain
I wish we could go back in time
To change it all again
He said "I appreciate that,
But would you please explain
About the fifty ways
to leave a bad war.. "
fifty ways to leave a bad war

And in the darkness of that
fallen angel flight
coffins surround you
and you know it isn't right
They felt the sting of death
in some bloody firefight.
There must be fifty ways
To leave a bad war
Fifty ways to leave a bad war

Zipped up in black, Jack
Laid out on a plank, Hank
completely destroyed, Roy
With a tag on your feet.
Missin' a limb Slim
Or shot in the head Fred.
Just one of the wounded, Lee
That's how it can be.

There must be...
fifty ways to leave a bad war...

Republican Party (to the tune of "Eleanor Rigby")

Ah, look at all the lonely people.
Ah, look at all the lonely people.

Republican Party, picks up the trash
in the hall where their meeting has been

Lives in a dream.

Stares out the the window, wearing a smile
that could bring out the blush on a whore.

Who is it for?

All the corporate big-wigs, where do they all come from?
All the corporate big-wigs, where do they all belong?

Deadeye Dick Cheney, writing the words of a speech that nobody believes,
The web that he weaves: look at him working,
hand up the sockpuppet Bush when there's nobody there,

Who do they care for?

All their corporate buddies, where do they all come from?
All their corporate buddies, where do they all belong?

Ah, look at all the lonely people.
Ah, look at all the lonely people.

Republican Party, lied to the church
about Foley and other big sins.

How can they win?

Turdblossom's done now,
wiping the dirt from his hands as he walks from the grave.

No R was saved.

Except the corporate big wigs, where do they all come from?
All the corporate big wigs, where DO they all belong?

Bang Bang, Waxman's Wooden Hammer...

Monica was skeptical,
She was too respectable,
For a real law school.
Late nights all alone back at Regent.
oh oH OH OH!!!

Ky-ull Sampson,
working for the Rovian,
Calls her on the phone.
"Can we get these a-ttorneys fired,
Mon- ick- uh?"

But as they put those names on the list,
A knock comes on the door.

Bang! Bang! Waxman's wooden hammer
came down upon the desk...
Bang! Bang! Waxman's wooden hammer
exposed what they had said...

Back in charge again.
Henry deals the cards for them.
Davis (Cannon, Lungren) gets annoyed.
Wishing to avoid an unpleasant Sce, e, e, ene,

He tells Henry "shut-up-and-cut-Monica,
A-break because she's blond,"
Whining when she sobs,
"It must not be So, o, o, o.."

But as she winks at those dirty-old-men,
He lifts the gavel high...

Bang! Bang! Waxman's wooden hammer
Came down upon the desk.
Bang! Bang! Waxman's wooden hammer,
Henry, you're the best!

P.C. BLOGOSPHERE-
said, "We found a secret here."
Henry stands alone
Painting testimonial pictures.
OOH -AHH, Uh Oh!!

Joe and Valerie, standing in the gallery
Watched old Scoot go free..
The judge does not agree
and he tells them So, o, o, o.

But as the cast walks out of the court,
A noise comes from behind.

Bang! Bang! Waxman's wooden hammer
Came down, that tough old slueth.
Bang! Bang! Waxman's wooden hammer
Made sure we knew the truth..

Whoa, oh, oh, oh. Wooden hammer.